1. People send me cards, and afterwards I never know what to do with them. Throwaway comments, throwaway well wishes, throwaway apologies. But I can't toss them. I keep them in this pile, a collection of throwaway moments that people have sent me from around the world. Malaysia, Japan, the States, Iceland, Egypt, and Melbourne. Some have a little more thought put into them, a little more quirk, and these are the ones I like the most; but I wonder how long I'll keep these things, my pieces of paper and cardboard that took but a moment for someone to write, and which, when I think of throwing them out, I am uncomfortable with.
2. It's a lot easier to deal with people who don't like you than those who do. One requires less consideration, after all.
3. In 2008, I turned off the radio in my car. I finally broke against the sharp rocks of dull witted radio personalities. I turned it on again a few nights ago to find two girls talking about weird images while on a road trip. One of them said to the other, "Have you ever been on a road trip," and the other replied, "Yeah, we did the drive to Melbourne," while the first talked about being in a camping ground. I sighed, and plugged back in my Ipod. Driving down to Melbourne and a nice freeway is not a road trip. Going to a camping ground is not exciting. Maybe it's exciting if you pull over and a UFO lands in front of you with bright lights and Elizabeth Taylor steps out, looking like she's from Cat on a Hot Tin Roof. Maybe that's a little different. Maybe, I think, it's too easy to get on the fucking radio.
4. I have a ratings box for the television. I said to the company that asked if I wanted to take part that I didn't watch much television, and they said that I was kind of the demographic they wanted, so I agreed. Consequently, if I happen to turn the TV on and Friends is on, I turned the TV off.
5. I have never really spent much time around writers. A bit here and there. I don't really know many musicians, either. Or painters. But I know a lot of people who work as social workers, therapists, and in other mental and physical health industries.
6. She sent me a message on facebook, wishing me a good Xmas and New Year. Really, I wonder as I read it, why do I keep this facebook account? At any rate, I never replied. The last time I saw her was the morning after my previous New Years, in which we ended up on the Super Lame evening of Vanilla Ice. It was a chaste kind of evening, though it could have gone otherwise, but even a little drunk--it was Vanilla Ice, and you can't go there sober--there were just things said that left me with the impression that I was better off alone. Well, alone as a kind of chaste evening can be. Maybe you've been there. Maybe not. Either way, there was coldness the next day, and later, when I sent her a message, she told me she had deleted my number. I didn't reply to her facebook message, a year later.
7. I have a jar I drop coins into. Never bothered with such things as a child.
8. She said to me, "I don't like sheets. They just tangle around your feet, keep you trapped in your bed. I don't use them. They're wrong." I'm 32 and it's the first time I've met anyone with the same opinion about sheets as me. Seems like a long wait on something so trivial.
9. Since the end of 2000, I've been on anti-depressants. Something to set you straight when you can't do it yourself. I never gave it much thought, but around the middle of last year, I figured it was time to give them up, and see how I was without them. So here I am, in 2009, without them, and I haven't had anything for a month and a bit, and I'm doing okay. Everything has its time and place, it seems, and we can only hope that I end up on some tower shooting at people now, because the world has given me the shits and I've nothing to blur it out with.
10. I'm standing in line at the supermarket, listing to my Ipod, and gazing idly at the covers of magazines. There's one with Nicole Richie on it, showing her in a bikini and big, goggle sunglasses. She's got these stick arms that look like they would snap, but next to her is a picture of Victoria Beckham, looking anorexic. The picture beneath Richie says that she's curved and happy now and, sure if you compare her to the latter, she is; that doesn't mean that in the world of sanity and awareness that she is, however. Maybe I should write a letter. Put a bikini on. Send a picture with it. But then I'd probably have to buy a pair of those glasses, and I've always thought that they looked stupid.
11. I learnt to write short stories by reading comics and TV shows. The structure is the same, or at least that's my theory.
12. I had a comic in this blog, and for a year, I changed the way I did things, tried to shift it so that it was at the centre. Since then, I have been wondering what I will do with this blog. I feel a little lost with it. I'm not sure what it should be anymore, or what I should do with it. There's an entire chance that it could have run its course, too, and that I'll be better off just shutting it down; but it's not there yet, I don't think, and I know what I'm like: I'll find something I want to do and I'll be full of direction and such thoughts won't even exist.
13. I hate wearing shirts while I sleep. They tangle around you, try to strangle you. That's not my scene.
14. For years, I had a camera, and I still do, if you include the one I have on my phone, but I barely take photos anymore. The camera I had broke while I was in the States, and while I was in a church, taking pictures. I've waited patiently for God to replace what he broke, but I think I might have to do that myself.
15. One of my favourite books still remains Thomas Lynch's The Undertaking.
16. I still figure I have time to become an astronaut.