Ben Peek (benpeek) wrote,
Ben Peek
benpeek

Humour in Reviews

Horrorscope is one of my favourite 'news' blogs to read, entirely because of the reviews it runs.

Here's an example from a review of Stephen King's recent novel:

Told in first person, King’s prose in this novel is simple and elegant; in a nutshell, its pure King, pure storytelling. I had the distinct feeling the first draft was composed in longhand. The syntax can be at times cumbersome … but I’ve yet to read a King novel that doesn’t bloat to some extent. In a way, it’s what makes his tomes worth the wait and money. One could almost say it’s what makes them endearing.


Notice that bolding? It's mine, but isn't it wonderful?

I can just see it now, in future gigs where I'm teaching creative writing. I shall start taking a ruler with me, and when a child begins to write on paper first, I shall slap them with it, and say, "Don't! That way leads to cumbersome prose!" I shall stop hitting them only when the tears arrive, for then I shall know that I have done good in the world. Perhaps I shall expand my demands to making sure that no one ever does drafts. Hmm. Yes, I think that's the way. No drafting. Drafting is obviously a ridiculous thing to be doing in fiction. Why write three or four times what you can write once, and off the top of your head, at that?

Why, yes, I think I've solved it. Thank you, Master Tait.

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