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Making Sure You All Understand

  • The world does not need a Doctor Who spin off. You're all letting the fantasy of John Barrowman fucking David Duchovny look-a-likes in a vaguely suggestive slash mash of Doctor Who and the X-Files for thirteen weeks wreck your shit detector.

  • Fuck the new James Bond. Have you watched those movies? There's not a good one in the lot. Showing any interest whatsoever in the new Bond is to show that you have not evolved. You are monkey scum and deserve those shitty, talent sucking voids of film.

  • Lastly, Doctor Who remains a dead property. It is kept alive by people who ought know better.


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Oct. 17th, 2005 12:37 pm (UTC)
The reason I like you is because my friends would beat me up if I said the things we think.
Oct. 17th, 2005 12:47 pm (UTC)

the lack of friends wanting to beat me up does make me special, doesn't it?
Oct. 17th, 2005 12:40 pm (UTC)
Oh sure, we don't need a spin off, but the Barrowman fantasies...that's different.

Have never, ever, understood the James Bond thing - such boring films.
Oct. 17th, 2005 12:49 pm (UTC)
i'm really struggling to think of one good bond film. there was a reasonable bond video game, but that doesn't really count, i don't think.
Oct. 17th, 2005 01:26 pm (UTC)
The last one was great. Bond surfed into Korea on a tsunami and drove around a glacier in an invisible car. What more could you want?
Oct. 17th, 2005 12:45 pm (UTC)
They're making a Doctor Who spinoff?
Oct. 17th, 2005 12:49 pm (UTC)
yes. it's for adults.
Oct. 17th, 2005 01:08 pm (UTC)
i believe it's a comedy called 'slappy and the daleks.'
but i could be wrong.
Oct. 17th, 2005 01:11 pm (UTC)
agreed on all counts.
(and i still have vaguely awful memories of the first doctor who spinoff- 'k-9 and company.')
Oct. 17th, 2005 01:18 pm (UTC)
Oooh, I forgot about K-9 and Company. It had Sarah Jane Smith and an evil coven of witches!
Oct. 17th, 2005 09:04 pm (UTC)
god. this sounds so bad.
Oct. 17th, 2005 09:07 pm (UTC)
It was. The opening credits sequence was almost entirely made up of closeups of K-9 waggling his radar ears while the godawful theme music played.
Oct. 17th, 2005 02:30 pm (UTC)
quiet you! galaxy would lose a lot of business if people started spreading your word around haha

Oct. 17th, 2005 09:05 pm (UTC)
i am making the world a better place.
Oct. 17th, 2005 05:45 pm (UTC)
Sacred cows make good hamburger, but hamburger is no substitute for a nutritious meal (or good criticism).

The world may not particularly need Dr Who spin offs, but if thats how Russell Davies can get to make a new urban sf show, then its fine. The world does need more Russell Davies television, if it needs anything television at all.

Sure Bond films are terribly terribly overrated, and the average quality is worse than people remember. And the lead character is emotionally retarded. A good choice of Bond can still matter. I particularly like Brosnan effectively doing brutal Bond satire in 'The Tailor of Panama'.

Lastly, Doctor Who is fairly obviously well and truly alive, in any sense that matters. Don't mistake what you don't like for any more broadly applicable aesthetic judgement. Its critically and popularly successful, its good (if fairly light and too kid oriented) television. Its cunning way of combining an ongoing cast with an anthology series, plus its way of conning its audience into accepting changes of lead actor, ensures it remains possible to throw new ideas into the show. Frankly, its hard to think of a series more alive.
Oct. 17th, 2005 09:07 pm (UTC)
Sacred cows make good hamburger, but hamburger is no substitute for a nutritious meal (or good criticism).

good thing this wasn't good criticism then.

Don't mistake what you don't like for any more broadly applicable aesthetic judgement.

well, if i do that, i have to live in the happy unicorn world where everyone is, y'know, happy. and on unicorns.

Oct. 17th, 2005 10:11 pm (UTC)
The world doesn't need anything from us, except for us to all drop dead en masse.

We would then make excellent fertilizer. Just the thing to encourage new plant growth and repair the biosphere.

Don't worry, the world's working on it.
Oct. 18th, 2005 10:07 am (UTC)
well, i wish the world would hurry up. i ain't got all day ;)
Oct. 18th, 2005 01:10 am (UTC)
Yeah yeah... with you on the Bond thing, not on the Who thing...

I dunno what the new spinoff will be like, but odds are it will interest me more than Monarch of the Glen, or football, or James Bond movies, or crap Disney movies, or Funniest Home Videos, or whatever else is on TV on Saturday nights...

Oct. 18th, 2005 10:08 am (UTC)
i dunno... those funniest home video shows are really picking up this year. less children caught in lawn mowers, more chainsaws and old people juggling.
Oct. 18th, 2005 01:48 am (UTC)
1. No, it doesn't, but it does need better dramatic television, and a contemporary sci-fi series written by Russell T Davies and the just-confirmed P.J. Hammond (Sapphire & Steel) starring a demonstrably funny and charismatic lead actor is a really good step in that direction.

2. From Russia With Love, You Only Live Twice, On Her Majesty's Secret Service, For Your Eyes Only, Licence to Kill.

3. Au contraire - it is kept alive by a large mass audience who watch it and enjoy it, and by being the singularly most versatile SF television concept ever put on screen. And it's genuine family-orientated television, which is in itself rare, and the fact that it is also good is nearly unheard of. If you don't like it, fuck off and watch something else. Is it hurting you by existing? I think not.

Ah, how I love your curmugeonly rantings. :-)
Oct. 18th, 2005 10:11 am (UTC)
Ah, how I love your curmugeonly rantings. :-)

i certainly have fun writing them :)
Oct. 20th, 2005 02:24 am (UTC)
For you, it's Doctor Who and James Bond. For me it's Starship Troopers and the works of J. Michael Straczynski.
Oct. 20th, 2005 03:13 am (UTC)
actually, it's not really james bond for me. i don't much think of bond films, and i can even zone in front of the telly to the old roger moore, sean connery ones. i just don't think they're any good and can't understand the fascination people have with who plays bond, since the films are always very, very minor.

dr who... well, i just can't resist attacking dr who for no good reason.
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