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Transformers: The Message Within



I finally figured out what Transformers was about.

Giant transforming robots?


Dude.

I'm talking about the message of the film.

All sentient life deserves to live and not be squashed by giant robots?


Dude.

What?


Did we even watch the same fucking film?

Apparently not.

You're not going to tell me it was pro-democratic, pro-military, and pro-Bush, are you?


...

Well?


What am, like a fucking retard?

Mentally disabled, please.


You and your fucking political correctness. Do you--

It's better than being fucking impolite.


--Do you want to hear what the film is about?

...


Well?

I'm thinking.

This might be a kinda fucked up insight. Like the original Predator being soft core gay porn.

Okay.

Okay.

Hit me.


Giant robots help you pick up girls.

Giant--


Giant robots help you pick up girls.

Wow.


It's pretty fucking amazing, isn't it?

You came up with this all by yourself, did you?


After the third viewing, it just kinda hit me.

Third?


I was just kinda watching. I was thinking, how does that weedy fucking kid get the girl? I mean, what's he got? He's got fucking nothing. I'm as good looking as him, yet I'm single, but what's he got?

A script?


A robot.

How about Michael Bay?


You're not paying attention.

See, until he gets robots, he can't pick up that girl. But he gets robots that turn into cars, and suddenly, she's holding his hand, getting involved in fucking battles, they're making out--and, and thing here, is the film is telling you, that if you want to pick up a girl, you need a giant fucking robot to help you get through the awkward stages.

A giant fucking robot will help you pick up girls?


That's the message of the film.

Is that why we're standing in an electronics store?


No, man.

Oh.


It's just fucking film. I'm not going to try and make my own fucking robot that transforms.

That'd be fucking retarded.

Comments

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shadowsandice
Jul. 6th, 2007 12:22 am (UTC)
Yeah, I came to that conclusion too. 'cept it only took me one viewing.
benpeek
Jul. 6th, 2007 12:26 am (UTC)
insight is sometimes a little slow for characters. also, three is funnier than one :P
mattdoyle
Jul. 6th, 2007 01:16 am (UTC)
I thought the guy was kinda cute with or without giant robots...but I'm not a girl. :P
speshal_k
Jul. 6th, 2007 01:48 am (UTC)
I am and I thought he was cute too :-)

(Weedy, yes, but I likethat)
benpeek
Jul. 6th, 2007 02:37 am (UTC)
pfft. straight women have the worse taste in men.
speshal_k
Jul. 6th, 2007 04:38 am (UTC)
touche
benpeek
Jul. 6th, 2007 02:36 am (UTC)
pfft. gay men have the worse taste in men.
mattdoyle
Jul. 6th, 2007 02:56 am (UTC)
sadly, this is true
artbroken
Jul. 6th, 2007 01:17 am (UTC)
I love you.
benpeek
Jul. 6th, 2007 02:37 am (UTC)
thank you, thank you.
speshal_k
Jul. 6th, 2007 01:47 am (UTC)
I did think it was pretty pervy at the end, when Sam and whatever her name were getting it off ON BUMBLEBEE'S HOOD!

Plus Optimus was watching.
benpeek
Jul. 6th, 2007 02:37 am (UTC)
yeah, it's pretty voyueristic, innit?
mariness
Jul. 6th, 2007 02:39 am (UTC)
You left out the message that using eBay will help you get a giant stomping robot and special musical car of your very own :)
benpeek
Jul. 6th, 2007 04:04 am (UTC)
hmm. maybe ebay paid for that...
mattdoyle
Jul. 6th, 2007 02:40 am (UTC)
"This is Optimus Prime, with a message to all surviving Autobots: Come to Earth if you like to watch"
benpeek
Jul. 6th, 2007 04:04 am (UTC)
haha
deborahlive
Jul. 6th, 2007 03:54 am (UTC)
Ask Dr. Peek
Dear Dr. Peek,

Here's the thing...I was planning to see this movie with my 12-year-old son. I mean, I bought the damn toys (even bought a second and third pack of some of the fucking little decepticons when the bastards got lost) when he was little. I deserve to see this movie, too, but after reading this post and the comment thread, I'm a little nervous. I mean...it's not going to cause some kind of trauma for the little tyke is it? I mean..."robots...girls...movie I saw with my mom...who bought me my first robots." Is this healthy association?

It's not sounding good.

Please advise.

Yours,
Worried in Wilsonville

benpeek
Jul. 6th, 2007 04:05 am (UTC)
Re: Ask Dr. Peek
Dear Worried in Wilsonville,

Taking your son to see TRANSFORMERS will, in all likelihood, stunt his emotional growth. For that reason alone, it recieves Dr Peek's Stamp of Approval.

Go with God.

Yours,
Dr. Peek.
deborahlive
Jul. 6th, 2007 05:11 am (UTC)
Re: Ask Dr. Peek
As long as he doesn't turn out a writer, then.

Thanks, Doc.

:)

benpeek
Jul. 6th, 2007 08:52 am (UTC)
Re: Ask Dr. Peek
my bill is in the mail :)
ex_chrisbil
Jul. 6th, 2007 10:10 am (UTC)
Re: Ask Dr. Peek
"Look at Phillip"

(you a fan of Mighty Boosh?)
benpeek
Jul. 6th, 2007 12:28 pm (UTC)
Re: Ask Dr. Peek
never heard of it...
jlundberg
Jul. 6th, 2007 04:36 am (UTC)
LOL!
benpeek
Jul. 6th, 2007 08:52 am (UTC)
:)
elenuial
Jul. 6th, 2007 04:53 am (UTC)
Very Clerks. :)
benpeek
Jul. 6th, 2007 08:53 am (UTC)
the first version in my head was a lot moreso.
black13
Jul. 6th, 2007 09:23 am (UTC)
It's not the giant robot. It's the giant robot that can transform into a car. His luck would have changed as much if he had gotten a car that won't transform into a giant robot.

Chicks only goes for guys with cars. You got no car, you get no girl.
benpeek
Jul. 6th, 2007 12:27 pm (UTC)
that's so 20th century. 21st century girls require transforming robots. the movie spells it out real easy.
(Deleted comment)
benpeek
Jul. 6th, 2007 12:26 pm (UTC)
see how the creative process works? you should message me more often in the morning ;)

huge makeover is often code for: if you were someone entirely different, i might find you attractive. which is justa bout right, i suppose.
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